What if you were gone?

Where would I go? What would I do? Who would I be?

I think I would

cry

and cry and cry and cry and there would be no consoling me because you’d be

gone.

I’d miss the way you held me when I felt hopeless, and how

you’d never judge me, you’d just

love me

 

I’d miss how infuriating you were, how reliable and honest, how

genuine, how true

I think I would find others, but none of them would be

you

What if I needed you? What if I cracked your stone

and tore my skin and broke my bones?

Would you hear me, and come up from your wooden box?

No,

you wouldn’t.

Your ears would have fallen off your head, your eyes would be soggy and sunk in

your clothes so thin, you would be cold

 

I’d call to hear your voice, but it wouldn’t

be yours

just an unfamiliar one echoing your number in my head

I’d tell a joke we had but

no one would get it, I’d tell a story about you but they’d be tired of hearing them

I’d watch a video of you

singing all the parts to your favorite record and laugh

and cry

over and over

 

I’ve never been good at letting things

go