Dear sadness,
I don't hate you,
Even though all too often you make me feel alone,
I know you don't mean it,
I know those skeletal claw marks you leave on my body aren't meant to hurt me,
But I'm fragile like broken porcelain, Cracked,
The scars you give me would make the moon howl back at the wolf,
You bring baggage to the table but it's not your fault that I can't always handle it,
You need me to handle it,
You cling to me hoping I can somehow save your childlike innocence from the things of the past,
So I take the beatings to protect you,
My one companion,
My sweet solemn sadness,
You hide in my chest,
Behind the rib cage,
I use it as armor,
And when I can't stand because of the weight of the memories you play for me,
Like old movies,
You tell me you're sorry,
Like sorry means more than just words,
You tell me you're the only one for me,
My bittersweet one true love,
You sing in my ear the sweet nothings of loneliness,
You tell me I'm worthless and undeserving of the life I have,
Then when the sobs quite you apologize again,
You hold my hand and hug me close to your chest
The sharp darkness of your fingers dig into my shoulders,
But I still come running back,
Even though your kiss tastes of kerosene and smoke,
I love you even when you beat me down,
Even when you splinter my armor and shatter my caged bird heart,
I run to you,
As sick as it sounds,
I love your venomous words,
I love your dangerous company,
I need you're pain,
It keeps me going,
It makes me stronger,
You're not as heavy now,
I'm used to the scars and the insomnia,
I'm used to you're deadly embrace,
I'm used to avoiding the subject.
Forever yours,
Sierra