Dear, the Most Merciful

I saw the devil today

In the scars on my body

I saw God today

He asked me for what I am fighting

I saw the devil

He said in your life child, you are just wandering

 

On the 360th day

For him, I had something to say

Why must you put snakes where my corpse lay?

Why must the serpent choose me as his daughter?

Face to face

 

I wait for the day I become awake

But not until these blood stains wash away

And I hang my head with shame

On the 360th day

 

Father said

Bismillahi Rahmani Rahimi,

In the name of God, the most gracious, the most merciful

No mercy is what He bestowed upon me

 

Father states

Alhamdulillah

Praise God

Yet God has praised me with misery

 

I was cursed with this beating heart

Am I mistaken for speaking in tongues?

The angel of death is sparing me, not for long

What have I become

 

Oh, how I have deceived the ink in my skin

Because this skin no longer fit

I treated it like linen

I ripped it

 

God fears the drying of my tears

While Lucifer dances to the sobs he hears

They’re both so cynical

Leaving me skeptical

 

Inside his palm he will keep me

God will hang me like his centerpiece

Leaving me in disbelief

That he would truly save me

 

I remain cold with this bad blood between my bones

Darling God, you have left me with the weight of the world

And there you go, burning down the only home I’ve ever known

And here I walk to you, in my torn-up corpse

 

I am on my knees

With this last plead, I ask God to spare me

Down on my knees

But he shows me no mercy