crash kiss repeat

i love you in the same way 
that a wave crashes
then comes up slowly
to kiss your feet.


out of your sight
i am crashing.
salt spraying and mingling with sand
to form tiny bullets
that will pierce your skin
if you get too close.


out of your reach i am violent
                             i am broken
                             i am scattered into a million pieces.


i am the wave
the millions of drops of water
                    of particles of sand
                    of shards of shells.


that's who i am when i'm away from you.


but then...

            here you are.


i am reformed.


the drops of water come together into
a single uniform thing.
i pick up the sand and the shells
and i bring them to you.


the newer,
   wholer me
comes to you.


i run over you
covering you with all i am
        bringing you all i have.


i wash over you, kissing your toes
                                       your feet
                                       your ankles.


i am with you
i am whole.


you gave me the strength to stitch myself together
      i hope i've brought you the happiness you've given me.


but all too soon, i must go.
i feel you dig your toes into the sand
and try to hold onto me.


and my heart aches for you, breaks for you
because all i want is to stay with you too
and i know the way you feel deep down inside.


but i have to go.
it's the way we work, love
      it's what fate decided for us.


and fate doesn't like to be disobeyed.


and so i retreat into the open ocean,
in a rush of seafoam and salt water


i leave you.


but i am content 
because i know i will be back soon.


and i may be broken when i arrive,
but i will be whole when i leave.


all thanks to you, baby.


because i love you
              so much.


and that makes all the pain i feel worth it

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