there's a moment when fear and dreams must collide...
i'm trapped in this world, lonely-fading-heartbroke-waiting
where do i put the shame?
it feels like a broken toy i can't play with anymore
where do i put the hate? into a pixilated screen i can't watch anymore?
all i know is that i'm here drifting somewhere in the vast...
you taught me to never look back,
takin' care of business was where it was at--jack shit now
you bring me down like a fuckin' disease
and i never see what you want from me
you got me feeling like a whore
cut down by the look in your eyes
never satisfied with your god damn lies
there's no where left for me to go
livin' in a river of sin, i never think about the shit i'm swimmin' in
i don't think i'm ever coming home...
where do i put the books? there's so many i could read
but they're all filled with lies
where do i put the lies?
there's so many i could say but it seems they're in the books
why do i think about all the things you can't do for me?
i don't believe in responsibility
i don't believe anything you say is true now
i don't believe in any kind of charity
when i turn around, i'm still surprised that i don't see you behind me anymore
and when i think i need you, i just remember all the times you weren't there
you covered me with all your hopeless fantasies i never had before
and now i'm living in my own reality because of the things you did to me
what kind of fool am i? telling m things you try to hide
and now i'm breaking down inside
when i'm beside you, i try not to worry about all the things you
when i'm by myself, when i look inside you
i can't see the way things used to be
what ever happened to the life in your eyes?
i guess it died when i started to believe your lies,
like a voice i heard in the night
if you think i'm crazy then you're god damn right
i need to get out of this mess you've put me in
you didn't happen to save my soul as it went out the door with the rest of my goals
well i just decided that i might like it back
and i'm as serious as a god damn heart attack
well now, i tried to make amends
when i said i was tired of these stupid little games
i didn't mean to cause you any grief
but the things that you do to me are way beyond relief
i never thought i'd feel like i was dead,
like a corpse just biting the dust
and your voice is like a bullet in my god damn head
all the things you've said, running through my head...
you say you're my hero, you say you're my hope
you say i'm your prince, your emperor when i'm just your dope
knew i should be worried, knew you might lie
used to walk in the sunset your shadow resists
my shape wants to follow and tries to kiss
if i am your prince, then where is my crown?
i should feel protected, but i still feel alone
all i needed was to feel wanted. guess anybody would
but you treat me like a child and that just ain't good
when the weight of the world sends you to your knees,
why do you lie to me? tell me please
here in the veins where a dream has flowed
and drained through the tunnel towards my heart
there you'll find there's a part of you inside
you try to convince me that my life is not lost
doors are closing in--what's that, i didn't hear you
listening to my old friend whispering in my ear
and did i say i was sorry? well, i didn't really mean it
i'm going back inside to lies too wise to let me hide
just another day when i'm locked upstairs in my room
feels just like a day with friends: just another day wasted again
just another day like all the rest, just another day spent in my head
when i think about you, i make believe nothing bad has ever happened
between you and me. and when i listen to you
i want to hear all the things you never seem to say
if you think i'm crazy, then you're god damn right
because you filled my sorrow with the words you borrowed
from the only place that you've known
if i meant nothing to you, why'd you sing with me at all?
what i am to you isn't real, what i am to you you do not need
what i am to you is not what you mean to me
you give me miles and miles of mountains
and i'll ask what i give to you is just what i'm going through
this is nothing new, just another phase of finding what i really need
it's what makes me bleed, and like a new disease i'm still to young to treat
that's the shorter story 'til i find somebody new
tiredness fuels empty thoughts and i find myself disposed
brightness fuels empty space in search of inspiration
rain it wets muddy roads and i find myself exposed
tappping doors but irritate in search of destination
when i'm down just let me fall if i must fall
i won't heed your warning. i won't hear them
i will dance so freely holding on to no one
you can hold me only if you too will fall
away from these useless fears and chains
and if you don't trust me, there's no where to fly
i'll just think of somewhere different from here
there's no reason to miss this one chance, this perfect moment
the pheonix may or may not rise
maybe then someone will see me
maybe then i'll be one of the "real ones"
thank you for your recognition...
what i thought was lost was never gone
maybe death's a magnet...
just let me fall
the one i will become will catch me