Athazagoraphobia
I see my friends after school
talking together
laughing together
walking together
And i wonder why i'm not with them.
And on monday, I hear them talking
about the oh-so-great movie they saw over the weekend
and my heart pounds
and my stomach clenches
and my mouth screams
but I make no sound.
My fingers twitch sometimes, did you know?
Seeing them in public, having the time of their life
my fingers start to drum a pattern on my legs
dont-for-get-me-dont-for-get-me...
but they already have.
Sure, they say hi when we pass at school,
and sometimes we even have lunch together.
Sure, we make rivers out of chocolate milk at lunch
and scream with laughter when someone calls us children.
I spend my every waking moment, however,
thinking about them
and what they're doing without me.
And
it
kills
me.
I sometimes think I hate them, did you know that?
I tell myself I'm too good for them,
those lowlifed devils
but really
I'm just so
afraid
afraid
afraid
Don't leave me here alone
Please
I will not be forgotten
I'm
so
afraid