1. The word bitch runs in my head like a broken record

 

2. I have memories of places of we’ve never been
there’s this lake, and we spend afternoons
just smoking weed and talking about life
 

3. I see daisies everywhere
I’ve already picked you a thousand–
but they don’t grow at my house
and that metaphor’s a little too strong for me
 

4. I can’t listen to Down in the Valley,
Stairway to Heaven, or It’ll Always Be
without tasting ash
 

5. I’ve already cried 6 times today
and we’ve been broken up two months
that whole “time heals” thing isn’t going well
 

6. There are nights I would sell
some of your best laughs and smiles
just to lay beside you and hear you snore
 

7. I am haunted by all those times
I didn’t say I love you, you’re beautiful, I’m sorry
 

8. There are days I don’t get out of bed
my heart beats with a limp
 

9. I follow you on facebook and instagram, obsessively
 

10. I hate you more than I’ve hated anyone
and I don’t think I can stop loving you
 

10. I’m waiting for my purple heart

10. I wake up each morning at 5 or 6
body shot with anxiety
mind incapable of turning off thoughts about you
 

10. I think back to that Z + A inside the heart
I carved on that bridge at Multnomah Falls

 

10. I would have married you and named our baby girl Rowen

 

10. You broke my heart more than you will ever acknowledge

 

10. You’ll move on before me

 

10. If I could take a pill and forget you
I honestly would

 

10. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to love someone
as much as I love you –
because even after all of this,
I still get butterflies at the thought of your smile