Don't Be Like My Friend Jude
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Don't be like my friend Jude.
He takes pleasure in being rude.
He never thinks before he says a word;
And on one fateful day,
He had the utter gall to say
A thing I wish I never would have heard:
(Just a quick note, right before.
All "colorful metaphors"
A euphemism for profanity
Will be carefully replaced
By a different word or phrase
Words that can receive a rating of "G.")
He said:
"Teacher, I am mad.
This class is very bad.
It's filled with POOP from the bottom to the top;
And every time you speak,
It's a high-pitched, annoying squeak,
And I really wish you'd just FROLLICKING stop.
You give us all this work
And you may say I'm a jerk
But it's too much and it doesn't help at all.
You're the worst teacher ever
And you need to retire forever
Either that or go to HAIL or climb a wall.
My little brother, who is two
Could teach better than you
Cause you're really just a no-good stinking BUNNY,
And if you think I'm out of line
Well then you should get a life
Cause I'm totally BADAPPLE and really funny."
Well, the next day Jude was expelled.
It didn't go too well.
The teacher was upset (his parents were too);
And it should teach you why
You should never ever try
To talk to a teacher like she's just a sack of POO.
Your teachers deserve respect
And you have a defect
If you talk to them in a way so crass.
Don't be like my friend Jude.
He takes pleasure in being rude.
It only makes you sound like an ass.