then it hits me like a truck

when my friends see my thighs 

and really focus

will they notice the scars

will they ask

and believe my excuse

or maybe they won’t 

But they won’t care enough

i cant let anyone see my hip 

or they will see them 

covered in scars

made when i was scared

it’s funny but sad 

what you do when you're terrified

what will they think

is the cause of this scars

will they think i'm just clumsy

am i that good of an actor

apparently i'm good enough

so that they don't know 

i'm falling apart

that i'm so close to giving up 

the people that are supposed to 

know me, to get me

don't know the battles im losing in my mind