i dont feel okay, not anymore. matter of facti dont feel. everyhting is numb. 

i dont feel sad, happy. i dont cry anymore, but when i do, i break and shatter. 

i dont smile anymore, but when i do, i glow and beam.

i break, i glow, i shatter, i beam. i have been broken beyond repair. 

how do I break the cycle? how do i plug the drain the im spinning into?

how do i stop digging this whole deeper, but start filling it, burying me inside?

how am i supposed to love others, when i cant even love myself? how? how? how?

why am i this way? why do i feel these things? why does it feel like theres no way out?

why am i here? why? why? why?

i break, i glow, i shatter, i beam.i am broken beyond repair.

how? why?

break, glow, shatter, beam, broken, why?