it seems like everything in life has already been experienced by someone, somewhere 

except then you're alone in the dark staring up at your stained ceiling

and wondering why you came out to that person

(and wondering if you were lying to yourself when you did)

what do you do then?

where in "chicken soup for the soul" do they tell you how to navigate that?

or what about when you're trying to explain the risks of your next surgery to your mom

but your voice is shaking because there's tears stuck in your throat

and the radio keeps whispering "we're never getting older"

(and you sit there and remember how you feel painfully 20 in a doctors office full of the elderly

and silently ask the radio, "how are you all staying young without me?")

what's the solution to that situation? what's the quick fix? the way out?

what happens when you're seated between your mom and your middle school crush 

at an away football game you wished you weren't at 

and he's still eyeing you up with a grimace, even though you're a mistake he never made

where do I put those feelings?

I'm starting to feel like compartmentalization is the wrong first instinct

but I can't remember how to change that in my settings

so I'll put myself on sleep mode

or, hell, maybe hibernate

perhaps restore myself to an earlier time

and keep clicking "remind me later"

as my firewalls remind me just how out-of-time I really am