I need you Always

 

What I need right now

In this moment is you

Because I've been standing on the edge of a cliff

And it's beginning to crumble

Brittle chunks, falling away

So I need you to push me

Shove me to the other end

Because even with all my strength

And all my will I can’t step away

from the false release

that goes by the name of death

But you with your capable arms

You with such hard resolve can thrust me away

And save me from the fall

One to which I would never return

 

But I still need you even after that

I need you to guide me

Shine a light through the cave in which I am trapped

Because even though you believe my soul to be dazzling

Its nothing but lights on reserve

And though you think yourself so mediocre

Your heart shines brighter than mine ever could

Flashing with an almost celestial glory

So please guide me to your lamp post

Be my lighthouse on the sea

And my beacon in the mist

So I don’t trip

So I don’t slip into the everlasting darkness

 

But still and all I need you

I need you to pull me out

Because even with my hand so close

My fingers seemingly grasping yours

a part of this monster still dominates my soul

Gripping my leg in efforts to keep me

So I need you to drag me out

Because in my fragile state I can not even lift my head

But you force my eyes to you

With you, powerful gaze looking down

And steadfast hand reaching out for me to take hold

So be a grappling hook that will never retract

Be my vine that never breaks

So I can be with you once again

Walking in the light

 

But even once I’m out

Out of that hole in the ground

That  I fell in all those years ago

I need you to hold my hand

Let me know your there

That your real, and alive

Because the devil within has me tethered from a string

And that strand can’t be broken

it’s a part of my whole being

And has been since time's beginning.

But that thread could pull me back in at any minute,

Catch me unaware

and have me dragged like a rag doll

So I need to know

that you won’t let me fall too far away

And even if I do

that you will push me away from the cliff

That you will be my guiding light

That you’ll pull me out of the pit

Because what I have always needed was you

 

Because your fullness fills all my cracks

That mark me more numerous than the stars

And your kindness brings beauty to my eyes

More than I ever saw

Your caring words make my fake smiles

Turn to heartfelt joy

And with all the positivity I claim to hold

You're the one that generates it all

without you, I would still be stranded

Maybe even accepting my demise

But you

even when you degrade yourself with words

You are my savior

My rescuer

And all I ever needed

Was you