Inner Self
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my true inner selfsecret person of the heart~ heartland of my soul......Mark Toney © 2021.5/7/2021 - Poetry form: Senryu (for you)
Thrive. Thriving. Thrived.
I'm sorry I lied.
'No worries, I know you did your best. Let's try a different solution.'
Bottomless tears now dried.
My attitude is mine, it does not reflect on you personally
I do not have the energy for that
Not to mention the world revolves around the sun not you
My attitude reflects on my inner workings
I don't want to stay here.
Do not accept where you live.
A Home.
It's not a home
Runaway, they're awaiting you
Live, love, and learn
Then be happy in return
But one place isn't the right time
I started this world from darkness
I was then brought to the light
my mind is free, it's concious
flying but others cannot see
So I write, I write, I write
I wish I could hide
Find a place devoid of you
But every space is you
No matter the distance
I am still next you
Caught in your shadown
I have it
deep inside
but it struggles.
I struggle.
The only need for my survival is within me
but it is kept with inferiority
They say to keep your head up high
My body is a sieve.
Full of holes, yet still whole. And intact.
It's a bit rusty in places-
once shiny and new, the metal frame is tainted,
I am not whole
Not yet
Not ever
I am pieces of a girl
stitched with shaking hands
and bloody fingers
Bruised all over
In a heart
as cold as silver
where is my plan
It´s not about how good you are,
It´s about how good you want to be.
Write words cuz I feel better about it,
Live and love are bad words.
Thought love would come not hit.
I remember ever crease in your skin,
Beautiful? Maybe
Always thinking of the right words to say
It would have been clearer if I said it my way
Every move is in need of some thought
Always unsure if they get it or not…
I am ___________.
Am I smart? Am I strong? Am I tough?
Maybe handsome? Maybe sweet? Maybe kind?
No.
Ohh, that's what they think I am.
The Center Piece of any person
Is a Calm that fills a certain type of rhythm
Steady, Strong
I think about this all night long
My tick is a tock, my tock a strangled cry