wontgiveup

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I heard something today... I heard that a dead flower is not dead until it's pedals are nothing but ash. Do I know what this means? Maybe.
  Pain, Torment, Hurt, Sorrow, Emptiness Feelings I experience everyday There is no way to describe Let them wash away and happiness stay  
I was wondering if someon could explain to me this word. One that's overrated and used by something over herard. I'm sure they perfer to give me a synonym to bend me in this ceaseless seach from the meaning of this word.
If i could cry the ocean drywould the color of my eyes wash out?And would my mouth be permanently downcastIf i stopped smiling for years to come?Would i forget how?If smiling takes less muscles than to frown
Have you ever had to deal with the pain, deal with the tears?Deal with the weight of the sadness that comes with a broken heart? Maybe you have, but have you had to deal with these all by yourself, 
Long ago there was A little girl, So Scared And Defiant And Young So small the wind Could blow her over And she never smiled And she never laughed
I believed my heart was scattered, thrown away like it didn't matter, I assumed that love wasn't real, and that time never heals. Exiled to travel a lonely wasteland, that's where I saw you, maybe an illusion, maybe I'm confused.
You're calling me a loose "canon" But you're the one so quick to take the picture   You tell me I'm "noting" to you But I've been upfront 100% and tried to fix our issues  
Is it wrong to feel unwantedIn a world so bigIs it bad to feel haunted By something you never did Is it scary to question Why we're all even here?Or is it human nature...To fear?
I remember how I used to want to be like Left Eye, Queen Latifah, or MC Lyte Record labels are hard to get so, I thought it was worth a fight However Nipsey Hussle was my biggest inspiration
*for my mother*    Yellow light casts its glow across the halls, ghoulish, Empty except for the sounds of whirring machines and soft feet. The halls open into a room where skeletons reside,
She wanted to win,she sumply had to Giving up was never her Fighting for what she believed in Always was her favorite route But when she fought,she realized thats where she stood untrue
I never truly belonged;  lived in a house that was not my home Day in and day out people did me wrong And my only solace was found in writing songs.  
  I remember elementary school When they told me the rules "A poem has to rhyme And it's all about the syllables."   I remember in seventh grade When my thoughts would fade.
I remember the laughing times I remember the heroic things I know the love you use to gave And I know the love you received
As i stand, confident as a lion, feeling like im on top of the world, people come in to terrioze,  thinking they are winning, but there not, I may have my days, but in the end....
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