Bitterness
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I am told bitterness and rage and envy are no way to live.
That they’re sins.
That they will only rot my heart and soul.
I can’t be made to care, though.
Like a snake curled to strike
In the dark it hides
Coiling tightly to its prey
Bad news bends me down
Like snow icing a birch tree
How much more can I take before I break?
Splintered into a thousand shards-
I can't melt my heart anymore
What stories would old bones tell us?
What stories would they sing?
I can feel my soul screaming
But my head won't let it in
I wonder if it felt like this, Rome falling way back when.
Confusion and frustration are present
We may be lost in the shuffle
Just get it together immediately
And move on the double
Nothing but pandemonium
Not a soul knows what is taking place
It is one moment that changes a life.
I don't care about landmarks;
This isn't what I speak of.
In my head, there are echoes of kindness,
Whispered softly but still heard.
Poison was her elixirAnd also her nightcap
Thus her imaginations comingled with theories of machinations
Many considered madcap
Thus inward she withdrew
from the garish world we live
Darkness appears
When one is not sincere
Nothing but a cloudy scenery
As a result of the ambiguity
Lots of chaos and confusion
Along with frustration
For it is better to be forthright
Who stole the light from your eyes?
I would say don't give me that face
But I know there must be a reason for it
A reason I cannot solve
Nor stop,
Nor save
Soon she will march in through that door,
And my head will be struck by the abrupt reminder,
A painful thunderbolt reminding me of our repulsive love,
The sight of her prompts the formation of indescribable feelings in me.
I am excising your soul from my body
I hide the good scraps of us under your bones,
So the gods will not deprive me of my memory.
You bitterness I will discard,
Your saccharine I will preserve.
Wounds, that illuminate...That spirit, that planted the seed…unknown!Just a biological relationship…is not a home.The soulknows you not…Depart from thee.
I want to say thank you. Thank you to the ones that have treated me poorly. That have taken my past and pointed it at my throat like a sharpened knife. We all make mistakes...
I had to pay, actually,
to find myself.
Didn't you?
I had choices,
I had to chose.
I had fallen to the social norms.
I lost my sanity,
Though my stars be dark and my spirit black
It is not without reason that you find this lack
Of empathy, pity, mercy, or care
For others of similar gare.
My stars were darkened by the sun
Feed me, feed me, morsels to the hungry,
But many times you're missing
The money, the money, dollars for my tummy,
To go to filling something,
Out of your happenstances
Circumstances, giving me money, honey,
Stranger.
Bitterness.
Anger.
Hurt.
Because of your bitterness
I am a stranger.
Because of my hurt
that makes me a stranger.
Your anger at the world
hurts me.
Every morning I sit on the table
And everything looks so banal
Until you sit with me on your silver tray
Every morning I sit on the table
And your fragrance fills up the air
I drink your bitterness because
Sometimes I just cant let go of all that anger
I feel like I'm Iago
Because I cant let it go
Oh I feel for Othello
I know everyone in my path feels the destruction of my rage
Like a Shakespearian play
The Idea alone
Is enough to infatuate.
It inhabits your every thought
Like Well…..,
An idea.
You can see it
Like it’s the present.
Or at least the near future,
And everytime I want to speak your name
I bite my tongue until I draw blood,
so that bitterness is in my mouth as well as my heart.
My only regret is loving too much
And succumbing to your poison touch.
You make me weak with your scent.
My mind’s a haze, my body’s spent.
Your eyes, they cut me down to size,
With prefect subtlety
It creeps in.
Woven in the words that you speak;
A part of the air that you breathe out.
The songs we heard under the wooden porch
Are still carried in my ears – ringing something awful.
Sighing anger is dead when we’re away and the
Great, wet blue is hanging above – judging
The little girl who smiles
as she skips to the store,
you see her so happy, so sweet;
But little do you know today shes happy
because its the first time in weeks she hasn't been beat.
the irk of tumoil
tosses me:
a hell bound angel
or a demon bound for heaven.
unsure
at times
of which is which,
a breath away from saving grace-
lost in the scuttling winds of time,
