Ive been thinking bout you a lot lately..Maybe a little too much..Breath stinking roaches on my tooth brush..Wishin i was on the road cooking like a food truck.no wishes grantedhate waking up now cus school sucks..  Eyes tearing up.Wish i had some easy e glasses This class aint easy how is he passing?Group evaluationsPeer reviews always calling me outI wish mtv would come come take a tour of my house..  Imean if they can even get in. Its pretty sad boy The door Locks messed up like when they signed to bad boyNo furniture at allNo table no couchBed on the floor.Scars on my legsFrom springs pokin out.Its a struggle no doubt.  Been calling off too much at the daycare..Lifes hard but why would they care..They just need someone to watch the children Feel like a childWhen i step a food inside the building Boss watching me like i watch them thats why i feel them..  Everybody countin on me feeling like i failed them Like a broke calculator. So much disappointed. Speaking of witch im already late for this appointment With my counselor but what really is the point man?  She just gone grill me about missing class.And how im messin up the semester fast.They say just move on but its so hard to forget the past I just hope i pass something. Cuz i aint work and get this far for nothing   Always told me when you grow up its not easierit gets harder.thought i could do it wished i thought farther I thought i knew a lotBut its so hard to tell your girl its gonna be ok when you dont know if its the truth or not  Try to listen to some music just to ease the problemsOn shuffle pac talking bout his momaNever could relate..Cuz livin in another stateHow could she ever put food on my plate.?  But i dont hate nawOf course i missed herAnd tammy was more like an older sisterCant replace the one who birthed me.But if anyone could do it man im sure she.Would be the one in the first seat.Wouldn't cross me even in a church seat.  She did the best she could.Raising 5 kids dont look easy.Little brother always tryna be me.They be looking up to meBut am i the best role model?Am i the one that they should follow?  I Wish i was the leader tati isI wish i was as smart as aidenAnd had the heart of gavin always tough.And like taya be the that everybody lovesI just wanna be the one that you are proudest of  And im not even proud of what im doing  now.So how can you be.I worked hard to get to ub.And now im hardly working.Making excuses..If everything you hate is reebokRight now the shoe fitsThats what the truth is..  You were always so hard on me..Me being defensive I never learned the lessons.Gassed my self up like idegestion Told myself i dont need you I praid for independence Be careful what you wish for cuz you get it.  Now im on this train 2 shiftsGot Assignments dueWishing that i had more time wit you.I appreciate you..Im sorry and i wish that i was betterI hope i make you proud  next semester Your loving son.