Lately I've felt the need to write, 

But when it comes down to it all I can do is hold my pen tight.

My page is blank, 

But my mind is full. 

Maybe I can't write because I'm waist deep in the bull?

Struggling to swim to assurance. 

I'm seeking validation in the wrong places. 

I try to turn to friends but I've never had one of them.

Try to confide in a guy, 

But he's one of the reasons why I cry. 

I turn to my family, 

But all they do is blame me and try to defame me. 

So I turn to the lord. 

I get on my knees and pray. 

I pray for deliverance. 

I pray to have the stress lifted from my shoulders, 

But I still feel like I'm stuck between 2 boulders.

When your young you think it gets easier as you get older, 

But the truth is your heart just gets smaller and colder. 

Your perspective on the world changes, 

And you're forced to turn the pages. 

So now that I am finished with chapter one, 

I see the struggle of writing chapter 2 has begun.