Where do i belong?

Sat, 04/09/2016 - 03:12 -- rexiusm

I live in a house, not a home

with people who are my family, but not there for me

my only love is keeping my ties to this endless carousel of agony

keeping my chest from growing a hole that can swallow my heart

keeping me from sinking below the bathtub waters and never returning

he ties me to him with jewelery and weekends together

i love it, but how do i keep going when i am useless to him

if we get a place together,how can i help him?

 

i stress over so many things at once that i panic

i collapse on the floor, gasping, reaching out to be held

im alone cause he is not there for me

my family is, but im at fault 

"you're making yourself like this!"

"do you want to go to a padded cell?"

"stop throwing a tantrum"

im reaching out to you, wanting to hold you

and all you do is give me a paper bag and send me to my room

alone, i comteplate death and the silence i would get,

but i remember him, text him, wait for him

he comes later and holds me tighly, he understand

of course he would, hes been through the same

hes my love, they are my stressors

how different would things be if he lived with me?

This poem is about: 
Me
My family
Guide that inspired this poem: 

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