What is wrong with My Heart?

What is wrong with me?

Did I receive a defective heart?

Because it seems like everytime

I start to like

I start to trust

be comfortable

Love

It rips me apart

I hate how I love

So easily so quick

Yet the result is that I end up

Alive and deathly Sick

So innocent and true

But then I end up alone

Blue

Afterwards

I tell Myself

Time and Time again

You’re moving too fast

To easily to be grasp

By the next person I thought had genuine interest in me

And yet why can’t I get used to this pain

I know why

Because my dumb naive heart is on my sleeve

not safe within my brain

What is wrong with my heart?

It seems to run me

I hate to the core how I can be quite a dummy

I need that affection and I crave that high

when the person I start to fall for

Looks me in my eye

My emotions have me by a spiked collar and rusted chain

Slowly driving insane

Because I can not understand myself

To the point it disturbs my health

I can’t sleep, and I can barely think straight

All of this because of my heart

Oh how I hate

It

The fact that i fall for such simple things

I’m dumb and naive

And I can not stand it

What is wrong with my heart?

Why can’t I set it free

From the trap, the cage, the pit

That is Me

I wish I could rip it out

and put it on the shelf

Squeeze it and wring it

of all its nostalgic, romantic, sentimentality

until nothing is left

I pray to be cold at times, I pray to be numb

I pray the day these feelings and emotions

Never Come

I beg to be set free

I want to be the commander of my own self

And set my mind at ease

from doubt, from pain, from rejection

That comes when my heart craves love’s affection

 

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

MariahJuliette

I am in love with this. You're very talented. 

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