So you wanna be gay, huh?

Well I'm sorry fellow,

but that just don't fly with me.

You gotta be straight and man up.

Show that God gave you some damn balls.

You think you know what you feel?

Come on now, you can't feel gay.

Just go back in your closet and don't express yourself.

Obviously you don't know what it means to be gay,

otherwise you wouldn't have chosen it.

So let me fill you in here,

Being gay doesn't exist.

If God wanted people to be gay it wouldn't be a sin.

You know that thing that we commit every day?

But I mean it's different for us folks, because were straight.

So since we don't commit that ONE sin, were totally holy!

You know what I say, 

If you put all the gays in one area, then eventually they'll die off. 

Now who agrees with me there!

Come on, you sinners can't reproduce so who cares. 

I mean because I don't believe its genetic, but it's gotta be genetic.

Now stop "choosing" to be gay, 

just like I stopped choosing to smoke cigarettes.

I mean, because what you're doing is wrong,

like ya know, its just wrong.

You are wrong.

Now that I've informed you on what gay is,

Come to the straight side,

we have sins.