1

My parents used to

hold and rock me

to help me fall asleep

2

3

The first poem you read

you will spend your whole

life trying to perfect it.

They read me

“Oh the places you’ll go.”

4

5

The characters in books,

their lives are perfect

they’re perfect

I want perfect.

6

Despite what the kids

say, I am not great.

I’ll show you.

7

Roses are red

violets are blue,

is it really okay to cry

when no one talks to you?

8

9

10

Backstreet Boys

puberty

poems about the ones

I've never met

11

12

He was perfect.

I couldn’t have been

more wrong.

13

Read me beautiful poetry,

kiss me under the stars.

I got pushed

down the stairs.

14

I want to look

like the lines

in my poems.

A perfect size,

stunning and

captivating

15

I don’t speak.

Only my poetry knows

I haven’t eaten in days.

16

A man touched me.

I cry myself to sleep.

17

The scars

on my wrists and hips,

I created them.

I’ve created insidious

poems depicting

my beautiful demise.

18

I dreamt about death.

razors to the veins,

bullets to the head,

so much I tried myself.

Sweet sleeping pills.

19

I woke up.

20

From the depths.

I am writing to

lift myself up.

21

I was wrong.

Death is not beautiful

and neither is the destruction of

your body and soul.

22

There are shifts in

the poems.

There is happiness.

23

This is the reason

why we write.

24

This is my story.

My beautiful life.