I cannot look at him.
I cannot think of him.
I hate how he makes me feel,
but I also love it.
I fear that he will find someone better than me
even though he does not even know me.
This is why I hate this feeling,
because he will never know how I feel
even if he knew I existed.
Nevertheless, if he met me
he would not remember my existence.
I blend in with everyone else,
but my heart stands out.
There is no way to see what is hidden.
Therefore, my heart could never be revealed.
I am even afraid to tell others about this,
because they may say
you cannot fall in love with someone like you,
but it feels so different.
I am foolish to believe
that I have a chance with him,
but at least hope is what makes
me seem sane; humane.
If I were to give up believing,
then maybe I would be less of who I am.
I may also be foolish to believe
that I did not choose him as my bias
because I favorite him.
I am scared that something else
helped me to see him stand out from the others
and that he will never know me
to find out what that something could be.
I constantly ask myself
if I am ever feeling something
that I am ignorant of,
but I must be stupid to believe such deception.
Maybe I cannot stand to look at his pictures,
nor think about him,
because it aches me to know that he is real.
I cannot look at him,
because every time I do
my heart aches for him even more.
I fear that I will be too late to show him my heart,
for his heart may already belong to someone else.
I would advise to save yourself from corruption,
but it may already be too late.
It does not have to be a pipe dream,
so keep on believing even if time
is not your reality.
Sincerely, your future.