These Thoughts
I wake up and fall asleep to the same thing on my mind
Unfortunately, this something does not go away with time.
These thoughts are the farthest things from being kind
But there is a reason they are here and a reason they are apart of this rhyme.
I always tell everyone to be happy and to live each day like it's their last,
Yet for some reason I do not expect the same out of myself and am stuck in the past.
I used to try my best to impress the ones I love,
But now I've come to the realization that my best will never be what they want.
A lot of the time I find myself questioning why I am still around,
And even though I'd never actually go through with it, my thoughts still bring me down.
I've never looked at my life in such a different way,
And now that I'm looking I just can't get myself to look away.
Much like a painting you can't quite understand,
You think you've got the meaning when in reality you aren't looking at what is really at hand.
Looks can be pretty deceiving,
I have learned that by putting on a smile I can have everyone believing that I am just fine.
I am not one who is fond of lies,
But sometimes everyone needs a disquise.
My heart aches when I think about the person I am becoming,
And when I think about tomorrow I cannot even predict what is forthcoming.
I never want to be a bother to those who matter,
So instead I just lie here and let my thoughts scatter.
I hope that these thoughts eventually come to an end,
And that overtime my heart will mend.