you demand that i push myself

all the while pushing me closer and closer

to the lip of the ledge

 

and i can’t help but think

of how just last week

i fantasized about jumping off that death trap toll bridge

my final resting place would be the bitter lakebed

 

death is the lover

love is the fighter

and god, does life fight to keep me down

 

i am on the brink

and i can’t help but wonder what others think

when they finally let themselves tumble into the darkness of their own minds

succumb to the seductive call of suicide

 

god, i beg of you

some mercy, please

for once,

heed my cry

and let me go

into that sweet good night