if you have stayed

longer than expected

you are one among many

 

 

for all acquaintances

grown attached

unintentionally rally

 

 

if you’ve seen my light

and enjoyed basking

long enough to keep you

then your hopes for us

are sadly not possible

and won’t end gracefully

 

 

for the shining light

that comes through

cannot sustain my bouts

of shadow

 

 

 

now deeply invested

and assuming the best

we will be kept alive

by spurts of love

always short lived

 

 

I don’t plan these

monstrous outcomes

but my light draws

helpless victims

to fall in love

with a farse

representation

of kindness

 

 

the traces of charm

left behind

within are the rays left

not yet absorbed

 

 

and when I am free

even for a moment

from my exhausting

exorcisms failed

my heart shows

who I once was

in brief clips

 

 

at times others

are drawn into

the trap that is me

 

 

time spent together

quickly revealing

the instability

of my mind

 

this tends to outweigh

the good moments

being spread

further apart

 

 

and then

as expected,

you’ll search

for a way out

 

 

I used to be hurt

when being given up on

but now I understand

and even warn the innocent

showing interest

in my slivers of light

 

 

aiding in their escape

from a mostly

dark

dark

boy