The SPOT

 

Late at night when the stars shine like this, I walk out of the house, run down the hill, past the forest to feel the wind brushing off my face.  For some reason, I always end up here in the same spot, feeling abandoned by everyone whom I thought loved me, including you! You were my best friend.

You were the only person whom I thought I could rely on --but you were the first to leave me when I needed you the most. How could you? 

I woke up every single day after having terrible nightmares - nightmares and secrets I only shared with you. 

That as long as you were here with me, my nightmares would  just vanish in the crystal-clear air. But Instead, I wait here - sitting in the grass looking at the sun pass away without you showing up.  Now all my daymares have become nightmares for the last 6 months. 

This spot. This spot was the place that made me feel like home you know. And you were like my family. 

But, now it feels like every other place. Empty. Quiet. Lonely. 

And yet --everything has stayed the same. The roaring waterfall, the towering trees, the dancing flowers, the green grass. The sun  goes down the same as usual, gorgeous and lavish. The only thing that HAS changed is ME. 

Somehow - I have become more confident in myself. I’m not the crying baby that pouted everytime I felt my world was about to crash around me. I don’t feel as empty. I feel -- peace.

I love to watch the waterfalls rushing down, the colors of the rainbow: Red,  Orange, Yellow, Indigo, and violet. All those colors remind me of how much nature Inspires me.  I believe that a rainbow is one of the greatest optical Phenomenons in nature. It never fails to put a smile on my face. I was once the lonely girl but now I’m .. happy.

At first, I was upset with you for abandoning me when I needed you the most. You were my best friend. When you were gone I still came here every night. Waiting for you.  But now, I thank you. You taught me something. Something that was missing in me and in my life. I thought that it was you. But now I see. All I ever needed was already HERE. Waiting for ME. 

She has always been here.   

She stands with me in the dark under the tallest tree in the forest. She speaks to me through this waterfall.  She comforts me as tears roll down my eyes.  

The Answer that I was hoping for, she had it all along. She was the one who nurtured me and the one who healed my scars as I looked up to the sky.  I now hear her when the waves of the ocean sing and I see her

everytime a rainbow reveals itself across the ocean. I feel her every time the wind touches me.  I see her beauty every time the sunset wakes up or goes to sleep. I am not afraid of my nightmares anymore. I am not alone

Thank you, Mother Nature.

 

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