Silence is deafening so I fill the void in between my ears and through my veins with noise.
Hoping it will satisfy my thirst
Or quell my fears
Or give me something to smother the monsters with and get me through the night.
So I waste time with noise,
White noise turning my ears red and burning out the feelings of blue
Numbing me and making me focus on something other than the sound of my jugular
Pounding on my ears
My insides crying for relief, but my mind wary of silence
It's hard to let go and make certain the uncertainty
To embrace the silence and whatever comes with it
But I have to hold up my hands and succumb to the fatigue
Each muscle reluctantly relaxes
As if my body was testing the water
Making sure each part of me is safe
And soon I've done it
Fallen asleep without hitting the ground
Shown myself that silence is a cloud, a trampoline, just below your leap of faith
And if I just take the first step, all I have to do is wait.