Seeing Stars


United States
30° 23' 26.0772" N, 88° 38' 17.664" W

The rain coated asphalt

Black and sparkling

I fell to the rock bottom

We use for parking.

Suddenly I'm


No thoughts of vindicating

Nothing was indicating

That he would do this prior

Didn't seem like when he called me a Whore 

Or a Bitch, or a Slut,

That it was dire. 

just words. 

Acidic and critic-


Spoken by a manchild who was cynic-


Apparently I screamed,


I bet he stifled that to a harsh


When he clasped his hands around my throat,



I remember nothing. 

Except what happened prior.

His enormous voice


This time dire.

And the rain coated asphalt black and sparkling

Swiftly greeting my face. 

It left a marking

One at first that was acrimonious

Over time just a warning.

A reminder,

To stay away from the felonious.

It's a day I'll never forget,

But it's content mostly forgotten.

One i'll never regret

Something that can't be taught in




I've come to realize in poetry we often romanticize everything. Everything sounds so beautiful and languid but when you dissect it, it actually is very sad... I loved your piece, from beinning of the stars trying to shine through the black darkness. Remember to always be that star.

What made you chose that as the opening?



The title makes it seem like it would be a story of beauty but it sounded more like a horror film, goose bumps all the way 


I chose it as an opening, because it's the moment that stands out to me from that memory. It's a play on what happens in cartoons. When they get hit, they see stars.  and thank you for you guys' input :)


This was really captivating


I loved your verbage. As I read it, it was almost rapping in my head. Strife and resilience..loved it.


I totally agree. This poem is great on paper, and it would be great as spoken word.

Peter Rico

I feel this one. You need to do this live!!


Wow...this was truly mind-blowing. I like how the title reflects in a subdued way the content of this poem. Your words....your rythm...your imagery...they were all perfect! 


It was intersting to read nice job!


I recently just joined this website, trying to get a feel for the other poets out there. You captivated me from the very beginning, what a beautiful poem this is. You definitely know how to write, xx 

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