S 'agapo Jon.

How are you still here?

Jon, how are you still here

through all my pain and all my tears,

through all of the fears I've laid out

right before you?

I delved into my heart and rambled on

about the things in my life that have gone wrong.

And you just took them all away,

You worked with me through all this pain.

And I'm amazed.

You're still here.

After so many years.

I would have thought you'd get so sick

to hear about me and that Caleb dick,

and about all those boys

who treated me like their toys,

and about my mom and our fights.

You'd talk with me all night.

All damn night if that's what it took

until I shook

off the hurt and stood up stronger

after being treated like dirt.


And I did feel that way sometimes.


But you were still there

to remind me that God loved me,

that if God loved me, 

I deserved to live.

And that if I took my life,

you'd be right there behind me.

And then I stopped.

I breathed.

I looked around. 

My heart rate slowed.

I calmed down.

Ahyoka. S 'agapo.

Everything will be alright.

Sleep well tonight.


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