Resilience.

The tattoo's ink is thick on my back. Shaded oar sits below, delicately shaded. They'll think its stupid. 

"You're the most resilient group of women I've ever met" Coach said

It stuck.

"I have good news and I have bad news. Which do you want first?"

Does it matter? Dad had a heart attack, Mom had a relapse again... they're both in the hospital. And I?

I'm top dog. I have a tight ship to run. Captain. Team captain. I did it, can't worry. 

Chin high. Straight face. I'm cold. They won't know.

Resielence.

With my sunglasses on, they can't see my eyes. 

Top four. Sixty girls, four plane tickets. Its a lone persuit in the single. 

Its time to put any pain, any concern, any worry behind and do what I do best.

Stay Reslient.

We're off the line, Freshman takes the lead and I'm not about that. Two six feet giants make their move too. Twice my size. Great. It won't happen.

No. Dig deep, Taryn, dig deep. Captains don't crack. They can't. 

Port side, I'm in fourth, but fifth place pulls even.

Fire. What is on fire? Lungs, legs, back, arms, mind. Its all in flames.

And then I'm in third. Freshman falls back, bow to stern. Seniors take lead. I'm in third. I'm in.

5' 8", 125 vs. 6' 180. My muscle is valueble, my body is capable. I'll hang with the big dogs, its why I am who I am. Not affraid of the challenge, I wil keep my bow here, or call for more.

I take one of them down. Second. RESILIENCE. I cross the line. The plane ticket is mine.

Resilience. It echos so loud and clear I'm handed my plane ticket. Its gold, pure gold. They don't know, but they'll be proud.

Closed door. I'm alone. Damp cheeks, dry ink. Its no longer a word. Its me.

Resilience.