Peaceful, Tranquil, Quiet
Words that can never describe her mind
Chaos is abundant
Whirling hurling swirling thoughts each making less sense than the one before
Each piling on to the stress
And the worry
And the disorientation
How can she make decisions when she can’t even decide how she feels
About the man who’s supposed to love her the most
How can she focus on anything when
Love and Hatred and Pride and Shame and Depression and Anxiety and the need to be
PERFECT
Thrash through her head all day
Everything scrambled together
Mushed and mashed like instant potatoes
In a butter tub
Her mind is ready to explode
Can’t handle
Can’t cope
Can’t decipher
Can’t discern the racing vortex
There’s a code she can’t break
Or a lock she lost the key to
Something must be able to make sense of it all