waves of desire.

stormy days and his ocean eyes,

and a world of hurt

being left to decipher

what I did I did wrong,

what put me so far away

from what I wanted

even after I wrote you a song

you'd never hear

and created a world

you'd never see

because it was always her

that was better than me.

 

a blue body of desire

rising up, crashing down,

holding me under, letting me drown.

couldn't even put out

my soul's raging fire.

the feelings; real

and intensifying every day,

but I want the impossible,

want the oceans to part.

and they're still so real,

fragile and thin,

and just as real

as my broken heart.

 

love, fear, anger,

rolling and rumbling

like an earthquake of snuffed out souls.

you pushed me away, isolated me

when I could've loved you,

had room for two hearts to hold.

a change of heart, a change of character

made me realize my worth,

and allowed me to see who you really were.

the drives of love and desire

were my mentors,

but it was only pure torture,

because you held the carrot above my head,

and snatched it away because you knew you simply could. 

 

waves of desire.

a world of hurt.

what did I do wrong?

nothing, I know now.

I wish I'd never known you,

but thank you for hurting me,

for helping me realize,

that you weren't worth it,

that I was,

that I deserve better.

and so I loved.

and so I laughed.

and so I lived.

onward.