One Hundred and Thirty Pounds

One hundred and thirty pounds
Not of flesh, or blood, or organs I speak
But of absence, of perfection, of all that I seek

One hundred and twenty pounds
Not of happiness, or friendship, or memories true
But of exhaustion, of messes, of homework to do

One hundred and ten pounds
Not of scholarship, or knowledge, or kindness to spare
But of celery, of miso, and two bites of pear

One hundred pounds
Not of vacations, or swimsuits, or sun on my skin
But of white walls, of doctors, of this condition I'm in 

Ninety pounds
Of hallucination, of bruises, of hope that has drowned
For I am not ninety, but I am one hundred and thirty pounds  

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