Ode to My Lost Brother

bullets streaming
clashing minds,
killing his and bruising mine,
tearing us apart and
breaking time
heart stopped,
glitching mind
a vessel of thoughts ran dry,
no love, no trust
not even a true beginning
before the ending of us,
a rending of us to
create a new meaning of us:
brother and sister.

Ode to my lost brother
malice cut his breath,
then began to cut mine
my emotions left broken
brothers are supposed to love you
brothers are supposed to protect
brothers are supposed to wipe away those tears dripping on your black love poems,
keep the ink from bleeding from one page to the next
brothers are supposed to be here
alive, arms wrapped around me

theres things I don’t talk about
things I don’t understand
I hear myself saying “I wish I had a brother”
let the void capture my trailing thoughts “…who took him away? Dear God, what murderous man…”

angry bullets streaming
breaking his cerebral and bruising mine,
dark thoughts invisible
I’m shooting back for him after all this time
after all this crime, lost in a world where what’s mine can be taken away so quickly, no sign, no time,
pacing to make a difference in a world where love is denied and I’m not allowed to cry,
brother, I miss you
brother, I never got to know and I’m shouting
brother, I’m your sister,
breathe, breathe, keep your eyes open,
i saw the darkness creeping in his eyes

brother didn’t listen
brother let go

Ode to my lost brother
weeping eyes filling inside,
a little girl reaching out,
sometimes i feel you there
phantom love, I feel you here
I feel you near,
writing poetry in my bed about you,
all my silent thoughts i feel you hear
sharing the same bullet marks in thoughts,
connecting in subliminal remarks, passing through neural synapses
my voice comes out and there you are

through me, your voice is always heard,
through me, your love lives.

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