I still remember that call.

Right after I got out of the hospital

It was stabbing into my ears just yesterday.

She said, “I’m sorry. It was a mistake”

Mistakes don’t hurt any less

I’m still replaying those scenes over and over again.

Your laugh, the laugh that bounced out of your mouth so carefully and graciously just as easily as those moans screamed out of your mouth as you fucked him.

You

dirty

fucking

whore.

You were my friend,

Or so you said you were,

But what does friendship mean when you believe that you have to go behind your so called "best" friends back to fuck the same guy she tried to take her life for.

His jawline so sharp and vivid that it cut my wrist and ripped me from my consciousness

I remember tracing the stubble and falling in love with every piece of him like I was discovering a new world that seemed so distant from this deep abyss I felt destined to live in.

But I should of known

None of those things belonged to me

Because they were always yours

Just like nothing was ever mine