God by: Luis V

God I love you and all but I got questions 

Where were you when I needed you?

Where were you when I was being bullied half of my life?

Why do I have the sudden urge to worship you now? 

Why couldn’t I get that urge when I was in 8th grade? 

When I was at my lowest?

Why now, why my last year of high school?

Where were you when I was getting my heart broken?

Where were you when I was a little boy and living in a bad household

So bad that I wanted to beat up my own father

I mean come on a 5 year old shouldn’t want to beat up his own father

God I know you were there

But why did it feel like you weren’t?

Why doesn’t it feel like you're still not here?

But I’m here pouring out my heart to you

I’m here trying to walk down your narrow path 

But it’s only getting harder 

I’m having doubts again

I don’t want to have doubts 

I mean I’m starting to feel your presence again 

Like the old times when I would get goosebumps every where

It happened these past two sundays 

It wasn’t big goosebumps but I felt them 

God you know I love you

And you know I want to live for you

But it’s so hard now and days 

These youths out here 

Giving me Anxiety 

I just lost a friend I made 2 weeks ago

The school made her transfer in the middle of her senior year

It’s not right we only got 6 weeks left to go and they made her transfer 

But I got her facebook

So I’m happy I can stay in contact with her

But it’s not the same

I won’t see her smile anymore 

I miss her lord 

But I know you said only things last for a season

But how is 2 weeks considered a season? 

To me a season is at least 1 or 2 months 

I didn’t even get to know more about her 

When we talked her eyes would open wide

People say she had a crush on me

I was starting to catch feelings for her

And I didn’t tell her because I was scared to 

I was scared to get rejected 

I was scared that she might have not liked me back

I was scared 

But God why did you take her away from me?

When I was about to ask her out to prom 

The school ruined it 

God I know these are a lot of questions

But these are questions that I have 

Like why doesn’t the bible mention anything about dinosaurs? 

Why do I feel lonely?

Why do I feel like my soul is in the middle of the battlefield?

At first it was in the grips of satan

And now it’s in the middle 

I need you lord 

I can’t walk this path without you

I need you

I’m here pouring out my heart

Yet it feels like your not here listening

When I know you are but I don’t know