I hide behind the shadows of darkness I’ve consoled myself in so long

I stop myself from moving on

I hide my wounds through the shade

I try so hard because I feel as though you can easily see my pain

I shield away from light because I fear I’ll come to face me

How can I come to face the brokenness that has become of me

How can I fix something so broken

How can I heal wounds I can’t see

Even though I know just saying it it’s not that easy

It would be easier if I felt physical pain

Just maybe then it could be taken away

But this is not a pain I can rid myself of

And no matter how many times I wanted to I can’t forget

If I forget it would mean nothing

If I forget I’d be numb to pain

If I forget even for one second

The weight of the world would come crashing down on me

And it wouldn’t mean anything to me

But my surrender to the walls crashing down around me

And ensuring that’d I’d never be free

But it can’t be

If I close my own walls then it ensures I’ll fall

And not get back up

But if I really want this to change

Then I can’t let myself slip away

And I wouldn’t be who I am today if I had let myself fade away

The only way to let myself be free is to fight to know and learn to love me.

My words being the sword and doubling as the shield to protect me

My poetry served as a source of strength, and a step towards healing

So what this art taught me was that I can bring light with my words, and let its beauty consume me

For it was a gift God gave me, and as I’m surrounded by his grace

He gave me poetry which gave me a way to give him thanks

My words shall never compare to The Word, but still serve as my method to express my gratitude for his grace

For when weeds surrounded me, my maker planted me, a new seed, in a new place

And surrounded me with the love no one knew how to give me

And said you are mine, and so you are saved

So may I end with, he gave me poetry in my faith, as a sign of his everlasting faithfulness, and this is the testament to his abundant grace