Don’t be mad

Because i wanted it.

You didn’t push it inside me,

So why are you raging with fire?
The words you said didn’t influence

My heart to stop throbbing.

If I really wished for you to shut up,

Then I would have stabbed my ears instead,

And still be alive.

 

I was taught to erase away

Things I didn’t like.

But there was a flaw.

I couldn’t throw away my hair,

Eyes, nose, or skin since it grew back.

Most importantly,

I simply couldn't dump my brain

In a churner and watch it die.

There wasn’t any fun in that because

By the time I took the parasite outs it domain,

My mind will be safe from my harm.

As much as I earned for such security,

I knew the type of person I was

Will never feel that anywhere.

 

So I had to find another way,

To cause pain

Inside the monster I have stored

Throughout all those years.

I needed it dead and the only possible answer was

Destroying the heart of such monster.

A monster I grew to hate,

Which at the end was only me.