My fears

I once I had 

a team building exersize

In which we told the team

our biggest fear


when it came my time I froze

not because I was afraid to tell them my fear

but because I couldn't choose one

Because I didn't have the heart to say


I'm afraid of everything


I'm afraid of the dark

i'm afraid of clowns and fursuits

I'm afraid of puppets and I'm afraid of girls

I'm afraid of adults that want to fix me

And boys that want the same


i'm afraid I might grow a pair and go through with it

and die physically

I'm afraid of change

and I'm afraid that nothing ever will


I'm afraid of crowds and empty spaces

I'm afraid of growing old

and I'm afraid of never getting the chance


i'm afraid that I love her too much

and she doesn't love me back in equal


I'm afraid of my father

and I'm afraid of my mother

I'm afraid of what they've done,

what they will do,

and what they can do


i'm afraid of losing her

i'm afraid of pushing her away

i'm afraid I love her


I'm afraid we'll get found out

I'm afraid she won't be strong enough to stand under the pressure

I'm afraid she won't let me hold it for her

i'm afraid I'd crack too


I'm afraid of men

i'm afraid of people older than myself

and the authority they wield 


I'm afraid of myself

I'm afraid of my anger

i'm afraid of my love

I'm afraid of my own intensity


i'm always



but I didn't say that

i shrugged

and let them move on

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