How many trophies do you see for athletics?
Soccer, or Football, or Track
Proudly displayed in a closed off show case,
every medal and maybe a plaque.
What of the Academic Challenge team?
The people who push buzzers all day?
Sure they might know a little bit more than we do,
but who cares? It's boring anyway.
What did you say about the Arts Programs?
Best piece in the governor's show?
There's no action in making, a sketch or a painting.
Just look, we're again 10-0!
Music and theatre? Psh! What are we, gay?
Only queers would take to the stage.
Besides, your shows are on game night,
talk about leaving us raged.
Or course they're important! Now our athletes can play four more years!
Never mind intellectuals and artists. Screw musicians and actors too!
They can fend for themselves. They don't need our help.
What more, for society, can they do?
Finally regrow limbs for soldiers?
Create new works of art?
Entertain the public for decades to come?
Write new songs that tug at your heart?
Who cares? Our athletes just won a state championship!
The only one we've ever had!
It won't raise my pay, or shorten my day,
but boy this sure makes me glad.
Glad I've given sports my soul and attention,
those others will find their own way.
If I ever grow tired, I'll be an athlete and muscle away every day.