Long Forgotten, Needed Things
There is a girl sitting in front of me
I have known her for years and
Though we are not friends we
Are not acquaintances either
She is talking about something
But I am not listening to her
I am thinking about her skin
About her hands and her clothes
She is talking about a teacher
Not to me, no one talks to me
I don’t know if they ever have
I stand up jittery and put a hand
On her shoulder, on her shirt
It is a stiff cheap yellow fabric
I look over her shoulder to
The screen of her computer
But I am now thinking about
How weird it is to touch her.
How weird is it to touch her?
I say this out loud to no response
They do not hear me, I don’t know
If anyone has listened to me
In a long time. It has been
Even longer since they’ve touched
Not in any longing way
It has been too long since
I’ve had friends close enough
to hug, and talk to, and know
And be known and be touched
I have isolated myself for so long
I have forgotten what people feel like
They have forgotten me, too
My voice, my ears, my eyes, my hands
They do not care what I do now
I am no one to them, not even a
Stranger or an acquaintance
Or god forbid a friend
I am a known entity they don’t need
To care about, they never did.