Without further ado,

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Please raise a glass to the bride and groom!

 

I hope I can say this,

After my toast at your wedding.

Assuming, of course, that you make it that long.

The point isn’t that you get married,

That’s not the important part.

The point is that you’ll be in your thirties,

or at least later in life.

 

You see,

The amount that you drink,

Affects how you behave.

When you’ve had just one,

Oh who am I kidding,

It’s never just one,

Yet you assure me that it is,

As if I’m the blind one.

 

Lying to me doesn’t help you,

You know that I don’t judge.

But the way you open up when you drink,

Makes me finally feel like I’m involved in your life and on the inside loop,

Like a broken record left to spin,

Down into a spiral that only ends six feet under.

 

I love you big brother but I’m following you down a dark path,

Scavenging for affection that I doubt I’ll ever find

I know you show it in funny ways,

But sometimes I just have to hear it come out of your mouth.

“I love you little sis”,

And I’ll say “I love you too big brother, and don’t tell no one,

But you’ve always been my favorite”

Cuz mom raised us not to play favorites,

Then constantly compared,

Despite age gap and gender,

And tried to picture us all as one square.

You see,

I love you big brother,

And I want you around,

But what I’m trying to do now is save you so you don’t drown,

In your own lies and vices that poison you like vipers,

I’m trying to save you.

Through my messages asking you to be safe and wondering when you’ll be home,

I’m trying to save you.

I don’t know what else to do.

 

But see I won’t always be there,

When you need just one final merge onto the right road.

I want to be there always but I can’t.

I can’t always be there and I can’t always save you,

Because while I try to do that,

I’m needing someone to save me too.