I looked our old messages, and suddenly it all made sense. People don’t appreciate that kind of thing unless they understand it, and the only way you can understand it is through experience. This boy whom I had grown to love, this extraordinary adventurer that has never been anything but insanely happy, was struggling with sadness too. It made sense: he had done all of these crazy things to escape the dark reality that consumed him. The drugs, the alcohol, they were all an escape for him. Ever since that day, he has spent every moment trying not the think about the things that have left him broken. And I realized all this because finally, I had met someone who had the same insomnia inducing nightmares as me.