Before I Sleep
I inhale, exhale; and can’t say I’m unwell
Can’t say I’m fly, flying high over wish-taker
But I’m tired.
Rain came, mud splashed all over my white sneakers
Death-seekers abound with nimrodic thrill-fevers
Look out my windowsill and can’t feel the chill
Till I realize the heater lies broken at my feet
And on the street, people weep to the beat of
Help! Help me, cause I’m desert-stranded thirsty
I want a roof or proof love’s not a tease
Please just a meal or to feel that this is over
And there I pass ‘em by with an icy cold shoulder
Why? Did my grip slip on hope for humanity?
More like a snip snip to my loosely knit sanity
How can it be that love’s definition is outdated?
Faded like some worn through jeans pulling at the seam
Even screams wouldn’t help me if I’m preaching to the pigs
And prigs who think they know what the meaning of truth is
You see, I’ve had it to the brim of blatant sin
In a world where before they take a breath,
You can plan a baby’s death
And I’m tired of the hustlers, haters, poison rattlesnakers
Of the hands held out under obligated eyes
Weeping cries of the bored, self-absorbed
And the six feet under standard we’ve set
And met every time bullets fly, shooting down stars
See the scars from dagger words thrown
Along with sticks and stones
But does the bone shatter matter
If your soul’s already sold?
Not saying that in the grime I don’t play a part
I’ve looked into my dark heart
And seen the place where it could spark
The start of white hot hate burning for no reason
Any season is the season for cheating, lying, and sleazing
You wonder why you’re wheezing?
It’s that filth you’re daily breathing
But I can’t give up, can’t toss the cross off my shoulder
Though it’s getting colder, I got the soul of a soldier
And I’m older. Yet sometimes I forget to let hope in
I keep going on, pulling strong out of the dirt
Work. I’ll work hard, work long, work sweet
Then I’ll sow what I know later I want to reap
There’s the road that I’ll take with my barefoot feet
Cause I’ve got many meters and miles before I sleep
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