I sit here,

thinking of the future

remembering the past

and longing for the passion of the present

I sit here,

unamused, broken down, and confused

of who I've become

and who I'm supposed to be

I sit here, 

wondering what I could do to make them proud

to make them see that I'm not a failure..

I sit here, 

in this never-ending war

the war in my mind

I sit here, 

And pray

pray for my individuality 

pray for my guilt to surrender and let me go

the guilt in not being who they want..

I sit here,

alive. 

But  I'm dead inside...