you should not say "i love you" to me anymore
that's what i told him

at least, that's what i want to say

he doesn't know what love is

that's what my friend told me

that's what i want to believe

"i love you" is what i say to my grandmother,

my safta,

when she has given me a piece of wisdom that i hold

close to my body, close to my heart

"i love you" is what i say to my best friend,

when we hang up the phone after she has cried her heart out,

because some boy broke her heart

"i love you" is not a phrase you, or anyone should throw away like you do

"i love you" should be wrapped up in a bow,

given to someone, like a present on their birthday,

surrounded by the light of the candles

on their cake,

surrounded by people whose hearts are pumping fast,

fast with feelings of affection.

"i love you" should be empowering,

like when you're gripping someone's arm,

if they're about to do something drastic,

and their heart is pumping fast,

fast with fear, and those are the words they need to hear.

"i love you" is not "why don't you trust me?"

"i love you" is not "come cuddle with me."

"i love you" is not "we're not that close but i'm pretending we are"

"i love you" is not always "i love you"

but when you say, "i love you"

one day sometime, maybe soon,

i'll know when you really mean

i love you