I didn't want to die that wasnt my intention but, 

the fact that I slit my wrist doesnt go without mention

Scared to face the damage i've done 

I allow my identity and my pain to become one

Truth be told I wanted to feel like I mattered

LIke if I left this world tomorrow someone's world would shatter

Like someone would care

Like if there was a funeral held someone would be there

For the people I trusted this was too much for their closed minds to handle

but I fear that keeping it quiet has done more damage than anything

Laying in a puddle of my own blood praying that my feelings would change

I didnt want to die 

I wanted you to see me 

To recognise that the pain that I internalize is real

That the secrets I kept were due to me worrying about how other people would feel

Living life like this has more than taken over my mental

With my heart, the world has been way less gentle 

Many of you would never understand that fact

Living on a day to day basis with the feeling of wanting to live under attack

Feeling like this barely made me alive, because I didn't feel like living but

I didn't want to die