I am...not enough.
I am “ethnic”
Too dark for one group
Too light for the other
Not proper enough to be heard
But too proper to speak in terms of "the brother"
Naturally born with characteristics others pay thousands for
Full lips, big chest, dimpled smile, errorless complexion
But still not the average example of beautiful
I am an honor student
From birth I've been placed
Only based
On intellectual ability
How well I can remember the right answers
How high my grade point average is
What my SAT and ACT scores consist of
Constantly competing for the
top spot, top rank, highest score, best college
Technically better than average
But still not good enough to be better than the best.
I am naive
A young girl
With an open mind and heart
Eager to love those who may not deserve it
This fact being obvious from the start
And even though I already know I it I
still try.
Offering a shoulder for each cry
A kiss for each lie
Repeatedly hearing how I would be perfect if I wasn't
Too young or too clingy or maybe too distant
How if only I was this and that then I would be IT
But still in the end I am not enough
I am not enough
And it would seem that although
I am never enough for the world today
That I would bow my head in defeat
But instead I embrace these imperfections that make me unique
You see, I am more than a label given to me
I am strong, an African American queen
I am an intellect, intelligent, and far from in between
I am loving, beautiful, and the missing piece to someone’s puzzle
Constantly giving away without being broken down
Because I am worth too much to see the tip of my crown touch the ground
At the end of the day
I may not be enough for the world
May always be just a label among a sea of others
but internally, I know I'll always be
something that can't be taken away from me
something that can't be labeled
and that something is ME.