Hurt and Misunderstood

Being in the state of mind I’m in now, is crazy I never thought I would be the girl who sits in school thinking about what I want to do. It hurts to say I don’t want to talk to him anymore. Every time I think of him, it just hurt a little more. He was the one I want to be with for the rest of my life .He was my best friend. Within these past few days that I haven’t talk to him my mind has been on a none stop run. Questions of what ifs and whys; Why did he do it? Why could it be easier on me? What if we didn’t break up? There are times I think to myself how didn’t I see this happening? I have thought of many way to try and come back to being happy without  you, but right now there is just no way that I can. I walk these halls as if I don’t care what happened between us, I talk as if I am not hurting but lastly I have been going crazy wounding if you are doing the same People have come up to me asking if I am okay but I have no answer for them. I think to myself “should I play it off and act as if I am okay” or “should I tell them how much I am hurt by what you did.”  I try and let myself forgive you but then I think of what you did with her and all the mean things you said, and I go back to seeing you in a different way. I don’t know how I will deal with this, but for now I think I will just try to understand why you did it.
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