Here's Hoping

Location

(For all of the veterans we have forgotten on the home front.)

 

The clouds are so heavy tonight.
Laden. With hope, or expectation?

Laying my weary frame down in the doorway, the cleanest one in two days
Wondering. Worth it, or not?

I blink, and my eyes close. But the shock of gunfire in my ear jolts me
Awake. Nightmare, or reality?

When will I sleep again?

A hoarse sigh
I shudder. Was I always so cold?
Looking up, the sky was the same as the day I stopped living
When I started dying for my country.

Here’s hoping there’s hope, for expectation killed.
Here’s hoping it’s worth it. What else is there to live for?
Here’s hoping I’m awake, so I can do something, anything
Here’s hoping they remember me.

Here’s hoping the loneliness stops
Here’s hoping the monsters won’t find me
Here’s hoping I was back there fighting
Here’s wishing I hadn’t left them.

Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori.
I believed.
But was it patriotism, or idiocy?

Here’s hoping something changes. 

Comments

Joelsoul22

deep man. just deep. i got lost in the flow of it all in the middle but it pulled me in at the end. and being a military brat and having a father that served overseas this means a lot to me. i'm not as much as a veteran who could relate to it. but still great poem

sacrifice

Thanks :) it's the solution to a writing block that lasted for about five weeks haha. 
Having a father that served the country at all is an honour. If no one else has expressed gratitude for it, well.... I want to thank your father for serving and apologize that our country hasn't done enough to reward him. 

Joelsoul22

Well you definetly ended the writing block with a bang! And having a wounded Veteran as a father he gets a lot of help and they are slowing improving the care for veterans, especially that is in war time, when it is not they get out aside, i just hope they keep them in their minds always. and this poem can definetly help!

WordSmith_15

Snaps line: Looking up, the sky was the same as the day I stopped living. When I started dying for my country.  

I love how you structure your poems. This is something that I definitely need to work on. And this is a perfect example of good structure and good content. The second sentence of each break is a singular word and that adds a lot of effect to the poem. The rhetoical questions also give in that personal feel. I think yo convey the topic of the poem well.  

Good poem overall. 

sacrifice

Thanks :) 

Additional Resources

Get AI Feedback on your poem

Interested in feedback on your poem? Try our AI Feedback tool.
 

 

If You Need Support

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741